“What’s in a name? That which we call a rose by any other name would smell as sweet.”
~Juliet, Romeo and Juliet
I’m not sure I agree with Shakespeare. A mentor long ago taught me that the names and labels we bestow on our children act as a self-fulfilling prophecy. He stressed the importance of choosing a name with significance for our children. He urged his pupils to speak empowering, uplifting messages to our offspring. Our children will believe what we tell them of themselves, he said, whether that be that they’re good or worthless.
His teachings never left me. And when I became a mom, I treated the naming task reverentially.
But Liam chose his own name. From the womb he did.
Liam means “strong-willed warrior,” and boy, has he ever lived up to his name.
In utero
My pregnancy wasn’t an easy one. I had to be on bed rest for extended periods, twice. You name it, I had it. Gestational diabetes, inflammation, heavy bleeding, high risk of miscarriage. On top of all that, I was super stressed. I lived those 38 weeks in fear that I would lose my son.
But at every doctor visit, and every ultrasound, and every heartbeat check, my baby was active, and his heartbeat was strong. That’s what the doctor said each time, “He’s such a strong boy. He’s such a little fighter.” He showed himself to be a warrior even before he was born.
Then came that fateful day when I didn’t feel his movements in my belly. I knew something was not right. I rushed to my doctor and tests revealed he was in distress. The cord was wrapped around his neck several times. I had to have an emergency C-section immediately.
I’d never prayed so hard in my life.
Despite his traumatic birth, my little one screamed at the top of his lungs moments after delivery. He announced his arrival with the presence of a true warrior.
There was no other name that fit him other than Liam, the strong-willed warrior.
The early years
Like the beginning, the second chapter was just as difficult. Actually, more so. We struggled immensely that first year, starting with low milk supply and a never-ending, expensive hunt for suitable formula. Turns out he’s lactose intolerant. Then there was the gastroesophageal reflux. Keeping him horizontal would cause him intense discomfort and he would scream in pain. We tried every remedy to ease the colic, but nothing worked. He did not sleep through the night until he was 2 years old. Add on top of all of that a severely sleep-deprived, depressed new mom.
Yet, he was the happiest little baby. He had, and still to this day has, the sweetest bellyful laugh. I look back on those days and wonder how I survived. But I mostly look back at admiration for this strong-willed little child that overcame so much adversity.
World of autism
But our biggest hurdle was yet to come. Autism became a part of our world just after he turned 2 years old. And, yes, you’ve heard me lament on the struggles, the meltdowns, the food aversions, the hypersensitivities, the lack of support, the isolation. But, today, I must tell you of the triumphs.
Liam has taken on and conquered most every battle put before him. His speech and communication, while delayed, is drastically improved. He can quarrel now! And can tattle on his playmates. Speaking of playmates, his social skills are on the ups. He’s learned with much guidance to use gentle hands and to take turns and to respect boundaries. Do we have slip ups? Yes, yes we do. Lots of them. But do we give up? No, no we don’t.
Let me brag on him some more
This little amazing warrior child taught himself to read at 3 years old! He loves babies and little children and is keen on nurturing them. He can name all the planets and knows what a constellation is and what makes up the Milky Way. He is teaching himself to play the piano. He’s empathetic to a fault, often sympathizing with the villain in a story cause they’re sad. Not only can ride his big boy bike, but he can stand and ride and do tricks. Like what? Who is this boy?
Enjoying the present
It’s easy to get so caught up in the worries and trials that we forget to enjoy the present. The present is all we really have, and I often forget that. I don’t want to miss Liam’s childhood, stressed about his future. I want to celebrate his triumphs, not obsess over the lows. I want to embrace his uniqueness, not stifle his differences.
Is he living up to the potential of his name? Is he a strong-willed warrior? 100% yes. Would he have done the same things had his name been something other than Liam? I’d rather not take the chance. 😊
