April 2021! What a life changing time for Autism Belize and our babies. We stepped out and told our stories, all in a drive for awareness building for a more educated, kinder and better Belize.
As we gratefully reflect on the successes and opportunities, one thing that stood out, interview after interview, was the questions and comments:
“Wow, how do you cope?”
You guys are amazing!”
“You guys are special, maybe chosen to do this by God”
and the best one of all:
“You guys are super heroes”
Support…
But here is the thing! While I know that such remarks are well intended, I wholeheartedly disagree! I am far from a superhero or special. I am just like any other mom who will do their utmost for their offspring. The difference that I do face unfortunately though is the fact that my job as a special needs mom is much more difficult as I face a world and country not truly designed for differently-abled individuals. I do not need to be called a super hero. I do not need the accolades, tributes or praises…what I need is SUPPORT.
…From Our Community
A community of people, places and systems that goes beyond just accolades and is willing to march through this journey with us is what I hope for.
My circle of friends is intentionally small in order to protect Eric. While I embrace the saying “it is a two way street”, I need my friends to understand that weeks and even months will pass without me sending a text or making a call. Please do not take it personally. You are in my thoughts and my love for you is unchanging, but sometimes the energy to simply send a text is non-existent. And by the way, just a quick check in from you rejuvenates, motivates and inspires me to keep going as it reminds me that you care and I am not alone.
…From Our Places Of Work
I need the support of a school system that works with my child and his needs as opposed to their archaic processes. A system that sees him as unique, after all that is why it is a spectrum. Every child is different, so flexibility is a necessity.
I need the support of my employer to understand that while I show up daily and give my all and achieve my objectives as I truly value and love my job, my role as a mother will always be the most important. I need my employer to understand also that work life balance is even more critical for my sanity, my mental health and for the well-being of my special needs child. More so flexibility is my greatest desire. I cannot control or plan for when a severe meltdown or medical attention will be needed during work hours.
…From Insurance Companies
I yearn for the support of insurance companies to realize that every time they stamp denial on my son’s insurance claims, they are impacting my son’s ability to receive all the required care and attention to live a meaningful life in society, his ability to speak and his ability to learn behavior.
…From Government
I need the support of a government that will construct and implement the necessary affordable programs that create the path for my son to thrive. Just to give an idea of basic necessary costs that I simply cannot afford is a whopping BZ$2,600:
…From The Business Community
I need the support of the business community to realize that my son’s disorder is not visible so when I explain that he cannot wear a mask for a prolonged period or he cannot wait in line with me or I will prefer to have an appointment at a specific time as he is more sociable and less sensitive at that time of the day, it is not that I am being difficult. I am simply striving to ensure we avoid a meltdown.
Let’s Put The Label On The Rightful Owners
If we want to label superheroes, then that label belongs to our precious babies. Despite the difficulties they face, they persevere through their battles and still find joy and also give us such joy and hope with their fortitude, winning smiles and quirky loving moments. They are indeed the true superheroes!
